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The Ultimate Conundrum

By Benji Elkins:

Crowded desks lined up - forming a “U” in shape

Three walls with an entrance, inside, a middle gape.

A young lad sits down and soon begins to write

A blank piece of paper, fresh, new, and white

Then he feels a tickle, an itch and a wheeze,

He looks up to the ceiling and begins to sneeze

Achoo he exclaims, like a tenor on broadway

And everyone looked over, like it was a fart on the subway

And as he sneezed so hard in his glorious tenor

The paper flew forwards and landed right in the center

He began to lean down, to pick up the sheet

But the desk blocked his path, he’d have to try with his feet

He slouched down in his chair and outstretched his legs

He kicked wildly and hard, “I need that paper!” he begged

He contorted his body, and put his hands to the floor

His fingers spread out, but only pushed the paper back some more

The people were watching, the paper was still there

And he crawled across the room as the people stopped and stared

Then a spectator looked at the man, then to the opening eastbound

And decided to raise his voice, “Hey, dude, why the f*ck don’t you just go around?”


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