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37 results found for "noah+stern"

  • Dept. of Education: “American Test Scores Now Highest in the World”

    By Noah Stern: In a statement delivered this week, Secretary of Education Betsy DeVos triumphantly announced that, for the first time in 30 years, the United States is once again testing higher than every other nation in the world.

  • BREAKING: The Teacher Can See Your Private Chats on Zoom

    By Noah Stern: Startling news out of Lockwood High School this week: It turns out teachers can read everything that students send over private chat on a Zoom call.

  • The Swimming Pool

    Dan Soslowsky and Noah Stern

  • The 2050 AP US History Exam

    By Noah Stern: Passage-Based Response | You will have 20 minutes to read and respond to the following passages.

  • Don't Ever Change

    Noah Stern & Spencer Armon 5/13/19

  • The Milking Cat Exposed: The Hidden Harm and Brutality Inside The Feline Comedy Juggernaut

    Benji, Dan, and Noah, the editors, they just kept spamming the group chat, saying stuff like, “We just made a ton of money off the site!” When Noah Stern bestowed nicknames on the recent inductees during a staff meeting, I expected something fun and witty. When my friend Sam Riko complained and said that they had crossed the line, Noah responded it was only a joke and gave Sam the nickname “Bitch Boy.”

  • Peloton Class

    By Noah Stern: The following transcript was taken from a Peloton cycling class on August 21st, 2020.

  • Gabriel vs. The Constitution

    By Noah Stern: Gabriel came to school in a three-piece suit every day.

  • A Poem of Displeasure

    With the total lack of "punch-lines" and "an utter lack of context" in many of the newer articles, the quality of submissions is clearly plummeting (with the exception of Noah Stern's weekly riveting articles). In fact, I am so furious about the current goings-on of The Milking Cat that I wrote a poem in ABCB rhyme scheme expressing my displeasure: Roses are Red Violets are Blue I spoke with Soslowsky We're starting a coup Ben's time has come The cat is failing But when I get in charge It will be smooth sailing New times are ahead With Spencer in charge Noah can stay Benji is discharged There will be more to come Featuring my displeasure New articles monthly Noah Stern is a treasure I took over The Cat So bid Ben adieu A change in command The Cat's started anew Note: Editor Benjamin Elkins forced me to add this note to the end of the poem or he would prevent it from being published.

  • Dave and Chris Figure Out Kunefe

    By Noah Stern and Spencer Armon: CHRIS: What’s up, Dave?

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