From The Mouth Of My Marketing Teacher

By Kaavya Shah

I’ve written a couple of articles about my marketing class, mostly because it’s the wildest class I’ve ever taken in my life. Every time I walk into second period, it feels like a side quest because to tell you the truth, I don’t even like marketing that much. I was totally on another planet when I was making my schedule and I picked that class. But, even though the content of the class isn’t that interesting to me, my teacher keeps my interest long enough to make me stay awake. This is a running list of some of the funniest things he’s said in class:

Watching a video and a bigger individual is being interviewed

Guy in the video: I haven’t eaten or drank anything in the last 23 hours

My teacher: dramatically pauses the video Do we really think he’s telling the truth?

Kid in the back of the class is fiddling with something

My teacher: Hey, chubby fingers! Put it down

My teacher: What kind of wings do you guys eat during the SuperBowl?

Student: I like boneless wings with barbecue sauce or ranch

My teacher: Boneless wings??!?!

Student: Yeah…?

My teacher: No! You gotta eat them with the bones like a MAN. Grab it by the sides and animal growling noises rip it right off the bone!

A student that’s kind of a troublemaker gets called to the front office

My teacher: Do you guys think he’s getting Student of the Month?

My teacher: [Student A], did you really think I wasn’t going to check if you had your lanyard and your ID?

Student B: No, she didn’t

My teacher: What are you, a spokesperson? I didn’t ask you

Student: Someone wrote a bad word in my textbook

My teacher: Okay? I told you guys these books are old

Student: Yeah but you said to tell you if something was wrong with our books

My teacher: Ask me my level of care

General Marketing Teacher Sayings

“Bubble-flip Nebraska”

“You have lost your tinkle privileges” 

“Triple-swaggered up”

Putting -ski at the end of any word (test-ski, dome-ski, court-ski)