5 Figures of Speech I Now Know the Meaning of But Will Never Truly Understand

By Lee Kirschner

1. “Bite the bullet”. Puzzling over this one definitely makes for a complex thought process. On the one hand, I get it. If you’re telling someone to “go for it”, presumably what you’re encouraging them to do scares them, in which case it doesn’t not make sense that you’d refer to something that is, well, scary, such as consuming a dangerous explosive. However, that brings me to the question of: why on Earth are we telling someone to consume a dangerous explosive?! Yes, we are not actually telling them that; it is simply for the purpose of encouraging them to go after what scares them. I just think there are less…um, precarious ways of saying that, is all.

2.  “By the skin of your teeth”. Meaning to just barely get by, this one confused me for a long time. Yes, in some ways it feels similar to “holding on by a thread”, meaning just barely holding on. You’re just barely clinging on to the skin of your teeth, or something. There is just one very big issue: unless I missed something big in science class, your teeth do not have skin. 

3. “Cut the mustard”. When you “cut the mustard”, that means you’re performing well in your job, or your assignment, or something along those lines. The “cut” part is, in my opinion, really the only part that makes sense. Cut the nonsense, cut the goofing off, shape up and do it right…sure. But…why mustard? Like, seriously. Mustard is a fine, respectable condiment; that’s not the issue. Just…what does it have to do with this? Also, the mechanics of cutting mustard deeply confuse me. Does it count as cutting if it’s usually in a thicker liquid form and thus cannot be sliced in half, or in pieces, or even altered in the same way by a knife? These questions are too existential for my teenage brain to comprehend.

4. “A penny for your thoughts”. This one truly mystifies me to no end. Is it just me, or is it sort of insulting? Personally, I’d like the people I interact with to view my thoughts as worth more than a penny, but I’d also not like for them to want to pay me to talk to them. That would feel weird. Like, think of if it was flipped around. If you told someone “Give me a penny for my thoughts,” they’d be surprised and pretty weirded out. And why shouldn’t they be? Charging someone for your company or opinions is just flat-out odd. 

5. “Piece of cake”. I mean, this one I’m sort of partial to, simply due to its relation to one of the most precious inventions of man-kind. I love cake! Who doesn’t? But when did it become associated with something easy? “I can do that no problem; it’s a piece of cake.” Like, no it’s not. I’m sorry, sir, but if you’re looking at a broken pipe or something and you see cake, you may have a problem. Just putting that out there.