Having an Older Brother: Fantasy vs Reality

By Seungwoo Lee

Fantasy: Your older brother will give you valuable life advice.

Reality: Your older brother will tell you that sticking your finger into an outlet can give you

superpowers (he just doesn’t do it because he wants to live a normal life)

Fantasy: Your older brother will teach you sports.

Reality: Your older brother will hurl a basketball in your face and attempt to throw you inside a

basketball hoop.

Fantasy: Your older brother will help you with your homework.

Reality: Your older brother will make you do his homework. He will also beat you up if you get

anything less than a B.

Fantasy: Your older brother will stand up for you.

Reality: Your older brother will - at best - stand on you.

Fantasy: Your older brother will help you navigate through your school life.

Reality: Your older brother will be the main reason why every teacher treats you like a convicted felon on the first day of school.

Fantasy: Your older brother will help you make friends.

Reality: Your older brother will attempt to start a world-wide movement against you.

Fantasy: Your older brother will give you words of encouragement.

Reality: Your older brother will beat up if you show any signs of vulnerability.

Fantasy: Your older brother will play with you when you are bored

Reality: Your older brother will randomly walk into your room, stare at you blankly, and leave without closing the door.

Fantasy: Your older brother will introduce you to cool music.

Reality: Your older brother will make obnoxious screeching noises in an effort to permanently damage your ears.

Fantasy: Your older brother will teach you how to fight

Reality: Your older brother will occasionally shadow box in front of your face and leave without saying a word.