By Benji Elkins:
Local suburban mom, Amy Lipschitz, finally became fed up the other day after seeing another news article on the fighting between Turkish and Kurdish forces.
Upon hearing about the death of multiple Kurdish civilians, Lipschitz let out a grunt of verbal disgust. “Wow, what they’re doing is really not right. They need to stop and understand their actions.”
As her anger built up, the concerned parent decided to end the Middle Eastern conflict by writing the Turkish President and accused war criminal Recep Tayyip Erdoğan a strong letter of disapproval.
“Well, what Mr. Erboflan is doing is really very bad and I knew I had to put an end to it. That’s why I wrote a strong letter that said, ‘Hey, I know you’re president of Turkey but what you’re doing is not right. I am VERY disappointed in you. You need to stop ASAP!” reported Lipschitz.
Close aides to the Turkish President have announced that they have received Mrs. Lipschitz letter and are discussing it and its subject intensively. Meanwhile, Amy has turned her passion towards writing a letter to North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un asking that he be “more kind” to his citizens.
Lipschitz is expected to receive the Nobel Peace Prize this Thursday.